The Delivery...
FRIDAY NIGHT... After they replaced the epidural, I realized with disheartenment that I was
bed ridden for the remainder of the birth. At this point we're about 40 hours post Baby As water breaking and all the " risk signs" started to build up but the doctor continued to trust the twins journey. Occasionally I'd wake up to see my birth team all cramped up in the small hospital chairs, the crew: My exhausted ROCK of a husband; my midwife snuggled up with the hospital blanket and our photographer/doula who all brought a sense of calmness even while they slept.
Time passed as I dozed in and out of sleep my body started to build a fever so the doctor recommended antibiotics to bring it down and stabilize. Confession; I've never had an antibiotic before and was aware of what effect it could have on both my & the babies systems so I was hesitant. Once again, our doctor with his calm demeanor reassured me this was the course to choose. It was his demeanor that allowed us to feel like each step we took we were making informed decisions and nothing was rushed into a process. My mind was trying to grasp the reality that my body would now be exposed to: an epidural, pitocin, antibiotics oh and the whole laboring of two little nuggets!
Around 9pm we finally started to see the cervix dilate to about 6cm, however, at this point all of the cards continued to stack up leading to a c-section from most other doctor perspectives:
My Age:37 (Geriatric haha)
The twins had been small the entire pregnancy
The fact that they were twins
Water broken for 2 days
Baby As heart rate kept having accelerations/decelerations
Fever
Baby A was bathing in Meconium (his own poop!)
This is exactly WHY our (pregnancy) doctor drove across town to this specific doctor, he made sure to assess the risks but knew everything was stable and there was no need to rush the next step - (read C-section).
SATURDAY...BIRTHDAY!!!
It was 4am when Baby A started making moves, letting us know he was ready to meet us!
The doctor came back to check my dialation, contractions and heartbeats all points checking in for the birth. After a couple trial pushes to confirm Baby A was in motion, it was time to head into the operating room! My birth team started to prep - laughing at the full length scrubs they had to put on - and what seemed like 20 nurses came in to wheel me down the hallway. With our posse in tow, we entered the operating room filled with blinding lights, stirrups and tacky wallpaper; let me reiterate none of this seemed to matter because the pure excitement of meeting our first baby boy absolved it all.
Turns out I didnt know what it felt like to push being a first-timer (does anyone?!), so I looked
to my photographer/doula and asked, "how?". I can't thank her enough for her calming and diliberate response, "Pretend like you're sitting on the throne." After a laugh, it registered so easy to me and after about 3 pushes later Aidan Lesgourgues came into the world at 4:25am.
The nurses swept him away without me seeing him and started all the protocol partially because of the meconium he had been inhaling had taken his breath away. Strapped to the bed I tried to see my son around the machines that populated the room with no avail. The doctor stepped in, somehow sounding stern yet calm, "Can we move things so Mom can see her baby please," and then he spoke up again when the nurse team tried to bring him to the NICU without me meeting him ; "Bring that baby to meet his Mom NOW." Daddy and our photographer/doula followed little Aidan to the NICU while the doctor and I waited to see what Baby B had planned.
Turns out Baby B wasn't making moves probably because he wanted to enjoy the open space without Aidan there, he was still hanging out on the right side of my uterus and wasn't ready to come out yet so we wheeled back in to the labor room. Meanwhile, Daddy was in the NICU changing Aidans diaper for the first time and supporting the little guy after he was taken away.
We are so fortunate we had our photographer/doula present not only to capture these moments but her presence and ability to step in to advocate for us was something unmatched. Throughout both labors she observed and chose the times we needed some guidance.
Not even 10 minutes after being back in the room Baby Bs water broke and I got excited that it would be soon we'd meet the next little nugget. Unknown to me, the cervix shrinks back up after the first labor since the second dude wasn't ready to rock. So 50 hours into labor or after Aidans water had broken we continued to patiently wait for our (stubborn) second son.
Fast forward SIX hours after FaceTiming with some of the family, a nursing shift change and a little sleep my cervix dialated so Baby B was finally ready to meet us
About three or so pushes later Liam Lesgourgues arrived at 10:35am. This time the doctor put him directly on my body, since the umbilical cord was so short he was placed on my tummy first. Once they did the delayed clamping of the cord Liam was brought up to my chest for skin-to-skin contact and it was the most indescribable feeling that would only topped by him latching to my breast seconds later. I remember looking up and asking my photographer/doula, "how does he know how to do this?!" to that she smiled and responded, "he just does."
Deja-vu from Aidans birth, the nurses attempted to whisk Liam away but the doctor stayed stern and politely demanded Liam stay in contact with me while they did any testing. This made all the difference in my experience and I can't thank him enough for being there and being present for me and my partner.
All along Daddy stayed by our side bringing such an absolute level of support that no words
needed to be spoken just his presence made it feel like everything was going just as it should.
Unfortunately for us, we were told that it was hospital policy to take Liam away to the nursery (the space adjacent to the NICU) and this is when I started to ask questions even in my delirious state! WHY? The response was because he was underweight even though everything else was checked out. He was 4 lbs 11 ounces but had to spend the night in the nursery.
One of the emptiest feelings I've ever had was at this moment; not only had I delivered the twins leaving my uterus empty but I now lay in the labor room with no babies. After being moved to the recovery ward my husband and I lay there snuggled up in the twin bed absorbing the sleep we had longed for the past couple of days. Always spinning things optimistically, we chose to think of it being our last night as just the two of us and we felt like we had just conquered a marathon together.
Unbeknownst to us the marathon had just began. After we got a couple winks of sleep we headed up to the NICU after the presence of my breast was requested by Liam. Still epidural-ed up I couldn't stand on my own so Daddy wheeled me down the hallway, up the elevator then to the NICU to wash our hands and scrub-it-up to see our sons. I headed to the nursery to feed Liam while Daddy headed over to hold Aidan. Per my request the boys would ONLY be fed breastmilk and no formula, which meant every 2 hours we'd be making the trip for Liam. Looking back I'm not sure why I didn't advocate to feed Aidan as well but I was told he couldn't be fed by me yet because he had to stabilize. And so began the cycle of alarms, hallway walks and breastfeeding adventures that would repeat for the next three days...
PART 3: The Hospital Stay...YES there is a PART 3 - HERE While we got to have Liam in our room the follow afternoon Aidan stayed in the NICU and there was no way we were leaving the little guy alone.